Polka Mass?

It seems that summer is still the season in some parishes for the "Polka Mass."  If you've never had to endure one of these during your parish picnic, count yourself blessed.  Since this liturgical anomaly still arises here and there, I think it's time we collectively called for a moratorium on the "Polka Mass."

Set aside for a moment the fact that no figure in the 20th century Liturgical Movement nor any Father of the Second Vatican Council would ever have countenanced the idea of such a thing.  Ignore the reality that the same band that plays at Mass invariably ends up playing a moment later in the beer tent (clearly introducing secular elements into the sacred liturgy).  Forget that there isn't a single objective criteria set forth by the Church in all of her documents on sacred music that could allow for such a deviation.  Never mind that the parishes that host "Polka Masses" would probably never heed the Second Vatican Council's directive that Gregorian chant should be given pride of place in the liturgy.  And don't mind that there are plenty of folks who accidentally find themselves at a "Polka Mass" who can't keep a straight face hearing the Sanctus set to oom-pa-pa's.

Rather, if for no other reason, we should do away with the "Polka Mass" once for all because of our concern for the youth of the Church.  I hear often how the Church needs to be more concerned with attracting and retaining youth and young adults.  Well, as a young adult Catholic, I do believe the "Polka Mass" to be one of the most effective means of undermining that mission today.  I don't think anyone could devise a more potent means of alienating everyone under the age of 40 (maybe 50?) and making the Mass seem irrelevant than by setting the music to polka.

The experiment is over.  That kind of tinkering with the liturgy has not produced fruit.  Pastors, please quietly retire the "Polka Mass."  Some older intransigent folk may complain.  But many more will thank you.


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